It was a very hot day. The entire city was suffering. I tried to stay at home so I got protected by the air conditioner of my room. Vanta wanted to be back at Pattaya in the evening. Until then I stayed at home. I hardly could move. There was no specific reason and it was not the heat. But I couldn’t move the entire day. I had to stare at the ceiling for hours and thought about my life.
But there was no pain anymore. The pain was gone. I could look into my past from a distance. A comfortable distance that allows me to pass through events of my life without any pain. Suddenly everything seemed logical. My life couldn’t be different. Now everything was clear. It was clear why I had to get cheated by my wife and why I had to loose the company, that meant everything to me.
Everything to me? At least before I came to this place. Pattaya, the city of sins. I had a couple of drinks – Whisky Soda. They didn’t brought me down as they usual did. No I felt good. Not great that would be too much, but just good. Who needs to feel great? Good is the best. Just feel good and have another drink. Those drinks made me feel lifted up. They helped a bit more to keep the distance to my life – especially the past. Wherever I sit or lay down, my past comes to me. But today that is alright. Let my past come to me. It doesn’t hurt anymore.
But it is time to pick up Vanta.
The day flew and went by so fast that I didn’t realise it. So I had to rush. Vanta and I suppose to meet at the Beach Promenade, in front of the shopping mall. I felt even more lifted up when I left the room to meet my girl – my little sexy girl. I missed her the last days.